We’ve heard of dad jokes and their infamy for being lame. But how do they put up against Alexa jokes? She isn’t so bad when coming up with witty responses, so she must be stored with some clever jokes as well. The good news is, she does hold quite an arsenal of puns and smart riddles that might spark a chuckle or two. The bad news? Well, let’s just say Alexa jokes might not be everyone’s cup of tea. But we’ll let you decide. Here’s a list of 50 of our favorite (and not so favorite) Alexa jokes along with their accompanying punchlines. You can hear them for yourself by saying, “Alexa, tell me a joke.”
What’s brown and sticky?
Wait for it… A stick!
I took the shell off my racing snail to make him faster.
But now, he’s more sluggish.
What kind of shorts do clouds wear?
Thunderpants
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line
Why are ghosts bad liars?
Because you can see right through them.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger…
And then it hit me.
Why is feedback a gift?
You can always return it.
What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?
A condescending con descending.
What did the Chihuahua think of her new bed?
She thought it was a little ruff.
What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm.
What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?
Make me one with everything.
What did the dog say after a long day?
Today was ruff.
What do you call an American revolutionary that draws cartoons?
Yankee doodle.
What’s black and white and read all over?
An educated penguin.
Did you hear the one about the man who failed to climb a hill without a watch?
He had neither the time nor the inclination.
What did one eye say to the other eye?
Between you and me, something smells.
Where do you take a sick boat?
To the doc.
How do you know if you are a pirate?
You just arrrrr.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Kanye. Kanye who?
Kanye believe I tell jokes, too!
How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, that’s a hardware problem.
Why did the mummy go to jail?
He couldn’t beat the rap.
When should you go on a cheese diet?
If you need to cheddar few pounds.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Isabel. Isabel who?
Isabel not working? I rang 4 times.
What do you call a seagull that flies over the bay?
A bagel.
I wrote a fart joke.
But it was too long-winded.
What do you call a grizzly with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
Why did the football coach shake the vending machine?
Because he needed a quarterback.
Why was the broom late?
It overswept.
When is a door not a door?
When it’s a jar.
Why wasn’t the turkey hungry during thanksgiving?
Because he’s already stuffed.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Sneakers!
I don’t trust people with graph paper.
They’re always plotting something.
Why wouldn’t the zombie cross the road?
Because he had no guts.
You know what seems odd to me?
Numbers not divisible by 2.
Why do ghosts love elevators?
It lifts their spirits.
Why did the banker quit his job?
He lost interest!
Who was the roundest knight at King Arthur’s table?
Sir Cumference.
What did 0 say to 8?
Nice belt!
What is Spiderman’s ideal job?
A web designer.
What hotel does a fancy cheese stay at?
The Ritz cracker.
How does NASA organize a party?
They planet.
True or false? The Declaration of Independence was written in Philidelphia.
False, it was written in ink.
What do you call two men on the wall above the window?
Kurt and Rod.
Excuse me waiter, this coffee tastes like mud.
Yes, sir, it’s fresh ground.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
She’ll let it go.
Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?
Because they had so many knights.
How much do dead batteries cost?
Nothing, they’re free of charge.
Where do beavers keep their money?
Riverbanks.
There you have it. The 50 best Alexa jokes.